If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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