I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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