I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
