There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
