If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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