just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
and she was petting her beer can
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
