4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
