Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
