She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
