Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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