if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize