I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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