id be glad to
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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