I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Slut skills are useful in every country.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
