I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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