nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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