She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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