trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You don't make any sense
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