So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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