Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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