When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
