I want to have your abortion
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
