So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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