I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
