Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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