i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize