yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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