hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
