please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
