Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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