evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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