you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
