Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
