they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize