if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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