just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
