nut hugger
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
