I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
