fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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