He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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