I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize