I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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