Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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