I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Randomize