we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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