Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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