ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
