I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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