I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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