omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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