nut hugger
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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